Chapter 47
Previously:
It is a bit of an idiotic formulation, but really, he’s been sending his drac to cuddle Radu so much he is starting to associate his own mind craft with it, a bit. And that is the harder version, not the one Quincy actually had been training with Cycy.
Stroking his fingers over Arthur’s cheek, Quincy chuckles and taps his lips.
“I’m not Cycy, I’m a minstrel, I can mind craft my emotions to feel like different things. My happiness about you telling me that you like to cuddle me, that you give me that enthusiastic consent, could and should feel like my drac wagging its tail at you.”
~
“Right, there was a difference…” Arthur remembers. “That sounds nice?” he offers, then makes himself say it properly: “Yes, I’d like to try that out.”
~
“Well done again, honey.”
Actually, speaking of using his mind craft so much, Quincy is hungry and Arthur is telling him what he would like, so he’ll reciprocate.
“Would my boyfriend be okay with me showing you while I have some dinner? With Radu needing my drac so often, I have used a lot of power today.”
Okay, yes, fine, he knows he sounds absolutely smug about being needed like that, but he likes it!
~
“You don’t seem to mind that,” Arthur lets himself tease a little, grinning at Quincy’s self-satisfied expression. “And, yeah, sure, go ahead.”
That idea has never bothered him, after all. If the dhampirs need some food, he’s happy to donate.
“Er, do I need to pay any attention? Are you hungry enough to maybe need a reminder to stop?”
~
Well, if they are at teasing, then Quincy can be a bit freer with his own snark here.
“Oh, don’t worry, honey, you are not the most skittish one I bite. I’m really good at stopping, or I might get the scared puppy eyes and that’s just too much.”
Chuckling but gently turning Arthur to be able to access his neck comfortably for both of them, he adds one more point: “I’m the one to tap at Cycy when she nibbles too much on John, normally. She’s the greedy drac.”
~
“It’s weird not to be the most skittish one in anything, uh… touching-related,” Arthur admits while he lets Quincy steer him how he wants. “And, huh, that surprises me. I’m not sure why? I would’ve expected Darcy to hold back more than you?”
~
Say what? Quincy is already snorting when he realises what led Arthur to believe that, and he ends up sighing.
“That’s her human mask you saw. The one she kept on around you because she was worried to spook you.
“With me and John, she is an uninhibited drac. Our forest goddess without any sense of restraint and decorum. The greedy wolf-girl that just wants to eat you whole with her love and her…” okay, pull it down a notch, Quincy doesn’t say “her desire”, instead changes it to: “…appetite. She’s just as bad as some of the puppies with the pouting when you pull her food bowl away. Just that those are a bit more me or John-shaped. Not that I don’t understand her, John is very nice to nibble on. I’m sure so is my boyfriend.”
That doesn’t mean he isn’t leaning in slowly, he hasn’t gone for Arthur’s neck before, after all.
In fact, he wants to test if Arthur will tell him no: head on Arthur’s shoulder first, just gently breathing against his neck, not even kissing yet.
~
The soft brush of Quincy’s breath makes an odd, prickling sensation shoot down Arthur’s spine and he twitches even while he huffs out a laugh. “That… kind of tickles?”
It’s not quite the right word, but the closest he has. It feels… twitchy?
Also: “I’ll really have to tell her she doesn’t need to do that when we get her back, huh?”
~
Tickles? Uh huh, why is Quincy pretty sure that’s the same kind of ticklish as John is behind his ears? But well, this isn’t John, this is his boyfriend, Quincy isn’t going to make a big point of staying away from that kind of touch. Unless they crack Arthur’s obvious issues, and he still tells him ‘no’.
Right now, he moves in closer, puts a kiss on Arthur’s neck, firm, not soft, which could actually tickle.
“Does this tickle less?”
Really, that’s a trick question, but he wants to hear what Arthur makes of it.
“And yes, please tell her, she’s suffered enough, she deserves to run free, and if you get scared, just remind her that there are other dracs here. She can be free even if she is different with each of us, that’s okay.”
~
The kiss is warm and firm, but still feels a little more… prickly than he would have expected.
Maybe it’s because things usually don’t touch his neck? Unless it’s a scarf or something?
“…Kind of less but also kind of differently?” He can’t really put it into words, he doesn’t know how to describe it.
It’s not bad, though.
“And I’m not scared of Darcy anymore. I don’t think? I mean, we were training and she was berserked and I wasn’t really scared, even though that was objectively dangerous.”
~
“The most dangerous thing about her is her pout and stomp routine, just learn to know when it’s best to not counterargue. I’ll let you know.”
Focusing on that part is all Quincy can do not to smirk about the very vague description of how the kiss felt, because uh huh, successfully gotten his boyfriend to let him kiss his neck without even being a little bit embarrassed or uncomfortable. That definitely deserves a reward.
“Remember that you can say no if any of this feels off.”
With another kiss, Quincy lets his lips linger on Arthur’s skin, opens them and carefully, slowly lets his fangs sink in, shoos at his drac to go for the emotions, not the hunting bite, and then sends it over with his affection for Arthur in the sensation of his drac lying on top of him, tail swishing happily and nuzzling at his face. That’s just the kind of thing he knows Arthur will like.
~
There’s a moment when Arthur notices that open mouth and teeth means spit and dampness, and technically, that could be kind of weird and gross.
But then he’s distracted by the sensation of furry, happy, affectionate weight, which is… odd, because he can see perfectly well that there’s nothing there, but also pleasant, and he decides it’s no grosser than when one of the puppies licks him.
He laughs a little. “This feels nice! Can I hug you a little? This feels like a hugging-back sort of sensation.”
If there was actually some affectionate, furry wolf on top of him, he’d definitely be hugging back.
~
Aw, Arthur remembered that he’s not a fan of being hugged. He appreciates that, but he still doesn’t like being hugged.
What he does like is a hand running up and down his back, so he gently reaches for Arthur’s wrist and guides him to do that instead. He hasn’t learned to mind craft more than one emotion yet, but he can manage to keep the sensation up and share another emotion at the same time, just about, a little bit of showing off doesn’t hurt, now does it?
So he can send over an affectionate wolf and his sense of enjoyment at the touch, that’s a good way of giving Arthur reaffirmation for the question and the adjustment.
~
Okay, he can also do that. Stroking Quincy’s back isn’t so different from hugging back, after all, he gets to reciprocate the physical affection in either case.
He thinks he should be able to also share some emotions with a bite like this, so he tries to send back his own happy comfort with this arrangement.
~
Now that is consent if Quincy has ever gotten it, (and he has, enthusiastically screamed at times,) but he still likes to feel it. It gives him the final go ahead to retract his fangs and get to dinner.
Ah yes, much better! Although, oh, he is spoiled, he thinks, spoiled for other blood after Radu let him at his sweet wine. Not that Arthur doesn’t have his own lovely flavour, but, ugh, dracs give the whole thing a sense of spice, and he likes his cocoa spicy, so obviously, he likes his blood with a kick, too.
Sadly, keeping up the wolf sensation burns blood and that would be counterproductive, so, with one more mind crafted lick to Arthur’s face, Quincy lets it fade.
And actually, once he finishes drinking, he kisses the bite, then leans up to lick the same spot on Arthur’s cheek as the wolf just did with a comfortable chuckle. “Thank you, honey.”
And then he can’t stop himself, what did he just say about spicy?
“So, how did making out with your boyfriend feel?”
~
Arthur blinks several times through the relaxation and then squeaks a “What?!”
Because… because that wasn’t how he thought of it! That was… Was that making out?
Quincy would know better than him, he supposes, and also neck-kissing, technically…? But also, that’s wasn’t… scary? Or weird? Or anything like… that?
~
Divine, all the emotion!
Quincy tries to not laugh too hard, hugs Arthur tight into himself and nuzzles his cheek.
“It’s alright, honey, you can tell me to never do it again if it was bad, but I didn’t want you to not know that, yes, you just let me make out with you.”
Chuckling softly but starting to stroke his fingers into Arthur’s hair, there is just so much control to be had here, so much that helps Quincy feel secure. “I enjoyed it very much, thank you.”
~
Now Arthur feels himself blushing again, and he cuddles a little more into Quincy, hides his hot face against his shoulder.
“Um… It wasn’t bad,” he admits, and then makes himself go a bit further than that: “Actually, it was nice. I liked it, too. I just didn’t think of it as… making out.” His voice squeaks again on the words. “Shouldn’t it freak me out, if that’s what it was…?”
~
How hard to push, now that is the question Quincy always has to weigh. But Arthur is already a blushing disaster, so a little bit more won’t hurt.
“That entirely depends on what the underlying reason for your freakouts is. Clearly, making your boyfriend feel good is not a problem. And, honey, you didn’t actually mind my kisses either, even the one I was too high for to realise I should have asked about first. I’m sorry about that, actually.”
Yeah, he’s not above admitting that he fucked up there.
“I promise to be better about asking first. But it’s true, I like making out with you.”
~
Despite the topic of conversation and everything, Arthur finds himself relaxing against Quincy. He just… makes him feel safe, especially when he says things like that.
“Yeah, that kiss surprised me a bit. But… it didn’t feel… scary? I’m not sure why I freak out, just that, uh, that sort of stuff makes me feel all squirmy and uncomfortable inside. But if this is… making out, then it doesn’t? I’m… kind of confused.”
~
“You don’t have to understand everything right away, but I do think it would be good for us to keep researching.”
Quincy can’t stop a chuckle at that formulation, but it’s fitting enough, he is going after one potential freakout point after the other. Testing out what will be too far, and what is just freaking out at some random assumptions Arthur has. Well, or not so random, that’s kind of the question.
“Your fear stopped you from Darcy confiding in you. I kind of refuse to have that kind of pitfall in… my pack.”
It’s more Cycy’s word than his, but then, he has a voivode who sprouts wolf ears and eyes on his leash. He thinks it’s more true than ever before.
~
“It did, didn’t it?” Arthur agrees with a sigh, turns his head so he’s less hiding in Quincy’s shoulder and more just resting against it. “And it really is… a fear.”
He scrunches up his nose, because he hadn’t really looked at it like that.
“I kind of thought it was just… you know, something that only mattered to me? Something that wouldn’t… hurt anything, or anyone else… But it isn’t, is it?” Then he perks up a little. “I get to be in your pack?”
~
“Honey!” Seriously, sometimes Arthur can just be ridiculous. “You are my boyfriend, Cycy is all over you, Radu is a jealous feather ball about you. I rather think it’s self-evident!”
Huffing because this is plainly obvious trauma again, but a different one this time, Quincy kisses Arthur’s hair, massages his head, too.
“Yes, you are part of this weird thing that apparently I am not looking to run away from, for once. And that means that, no, you aren’t allowed to not work on your fear, because it is going to hurt more than just Darcy. But I’ll always do it gently. Do you trust me to not ever intentionally hurt you? Do you trust me to listen to your ‘no’ the way I did before?”
~
Arthur looks up at Quincy. There’s a definite warm rush of… hope? Yeah, he thinks that’s hope, and wanting, and such, in his chest at him saying Arthur is part of his pack.
“Well, what with Radu being jealous, you could decide that he was more important than me… But I guess you won’t?” He offers Quincy a hopeful smile. “With what you just said? Because, yeah, I do trust you. Also that you’ll notice when I’m trying to communicate and maybe don’t do so well.”
~
Maybe he shouldn’t joke about it, but what can he say, Quincy is a lot of things, but two things he is for sure.
“Please, I’m a harlot and I’m terrible at not listening in on your thoughts. Why would I ever get only the benefit of one of you when I have both of you eager? And how am I supposed to not notice when you try to tell me if I’m listening to you anyway?”
Leaning up and rubbing their noses together gently, Quincy chuckles. “Seriously, that’s so absurd I should get you to make out with me more so I can show you properly that I like you!”
~
Of course, Arthur blushes furiously again, but he also finds himself with a grin.
“That doesn’t even sound scary. You’re very good at not being scary with this making out and kissing thing…” He swallows what is definitely a giggle, not a chuckle. “I can’t believe I’m now someone who’s kissed someone… Me! And, um… someone male and pretty, too…”
His face is going to burn right off at this rate, and he darts a look at Quincy to see if that was okay to admit.
~
“You think I’m pretty? Tell me more!”
Now that’s what Quincy would call a good return of investment. Arthur is shaping up nicely as a boyfriend. Not being scary, okay, he can try, not that Arthur gets him going, so his dominant tendencies are relatively asleep as is. Ergo, they won’t hiss at his next manoeuvre.
Taking a hold of Arthur, Quincy turns them around, pulls Arthur on top of himself so he can grin up at him.
“Tell me more and kiss me so that it becomes easier for you to believe.”
~
That seems like a good reaction, Arthur decides, while he blinks down at Quincy from his new position.
“Uh… Well, you are?” He’s never told anyone anything like that, of course, but… Well, clearly it’s the right thing to do. “I don’t know how to put it or what else to say? But you’re… nice to look at?”
~
Hopeless.
Quincy snorts and leans up to ghost a kiss on Arthur’s lips.
“We need to work on your ‘sweet talking your boyfriend’ skills, honey. Details, please, tell me that my eyes shine like the stars, my sharp features make you want to run your fingers over them, my lips being so soft that you can’t get enough of them. Those kinds of things.”
It nearly is a bit mean, but he adds with a sigh and a wider grin: “Radu could teach you, the old silver-tongued drac.”
~
Arthur swallows another giggle, part nervous and part giddy.
“You think Radu, being jealous, would teach me how to… sweet talk you? Wouldn’t that be, like, against his interests?”
And Quincy did ask him to kiss him, and he’s feeling all daring and so not freaked out, so he leans down to also put a small kiss on Quincy’s lips.
~
There, finally. Quick reinforcement incoming. Quincy sticks his hands into Arthur’s hair and purrs loudly at the kiss.
“It would give him an excuse to show off his skills, he could impress me with the examples he gives. Trust me when I say he would find a way. Not going to lie, I really enjoy having another social player here. Well, one I want to kiss, Tits isn’t a candidate for that.”
~
That just feels so relaxing. Arthur melts a little more onto Quincy.
“I can understand that… Also, well, I don’t trust him fully yet and all, but the idea of having such a powerful voivode around… is really appealing.”
~
“Just imagine how it feels to have him around my little finger.”
Yes, he’s smug as all hell about this and not sorry for it one bit. Also not sorry for being able to make Arthur melt into him like that. Yes, now that’s the kind of control over his relationships that will help him not go completely crazy about Llew’s comment about him not having any control over his relationship with Darcy. No, much better focusing on this, stroking his fingers through Arthur’s hair and humming softly.
~
“And I trust you,” Arthur muses. “So if you’re sure you have him wrapped around your little finger, I guess that means I can feel safe about him, too?”
~
Oh Divine, since when is he this gracious towards others? But, it would feel somewhat wrong to not mention it, slightly embarrassing and, yes, admitting to a weakness as it is: “Without him, I don’t think you should trust me as much. He’s making me better, he’s the reason my drac isn’t slowly but surely driving me insane. Without Cycy,” okay, fine, he’s biting his lip, he does not want to say it, the whispers in the back are hissing and scratching and shrieking, but that means it’s fae, and maybe he wants to piss them off, so he does admit to it: “without Cycy, I might need him.”
~
Arthur bites his lip. “It’s really bad for you, huh? Um, do you want to talk about it? Or rather not?”
~
The absurdity of the situation makes Quincy laugh. Him, not talking? Oh, that would be a new one.
But the fact of the matter is, he has nothing to talk about.
So instead, he leans up and kisses Arthur, fangs and all, to show him his appreciation of the offer, his current relaxation, and yes, just a little bit, the war that’s on the inside, the way the whispers feel and how his drac is besieged and barking, before he leans back into the pillows with a sigh.
“For once in my life I don’t think talking will do much. I can show it to Radu, he can waltz right in here and we can manage our dracs together. Thank you for offering, but I think I’d rather just keep making out until we fall asleep.”
~
“Okay, then we’ll do that!”
It was only a glimpse, but it was enough to give Arthur an inkling of how… torn Quincy is feeling.
It makes him want to give his drac a hug, but since Quincy doesn’t like being hugged, probably neither does his drac.
He wonders if it also likes giving hugs? It should, right?
He’s still not quite sure on this whole drac business, whether it’s really an independent entity or a kind of manifestation of the person or what.
But either way, even though he still feels a bit shy about it, he leans in to give Quincy another kiss. That’s what he requested, after all.
And it isn’t that long of trading some gentle kisses before Arthur feels his eyelids grow heavy, and he moves to cuddle into Quincy’s side, where Quincy wishes him: “Sleep well, honey.”
Arthur returns the sentiment in a murmur, and then sleep drags him under into comfortable, relaxed darkness.
17 Jan 1900
And he almost gets to sleep through the night- Quincy only wakes him once, at some point in the small hours, to tell him that Radu is back, and that they’ll be having a little trip to Vienna. Arthur wishes him a sleepy good trip and falls back asleep quickly.
So quickly that it takes some searching of his mind the next morning to figure out if he dreamed that or if that really happened. But Quincy’s gone, and he’s pretty sure it was Vienna he said.
Mariam is downright chipper when he meets her at breakfast, and somehow, they end up deciding to take the day off. They’re waiting on new information anyway, and Mariam is clearly feeling the high of not having to keep parts of herself secret anymore and still having the social security of the engagement. John offers to take her shooting, and Arthur decides to go riding.
Not for a quick hour or so on the grounds. No, he realizes, this is the first time since he got Hannibal, basically, that no threat of vampires hangs over their heads, and he’s going to make use of it. He’s going to pack himself a lunch, and a map, and take his horse, and just go explore the countryside. Maybe even let Hannibal run properly and have a look at the moors.
So he wishes Mariam and John a good day, and tells them to only start worrying if he’s not back by tea time. Maybe it’s still risky- people get lost on moors, and fall into bogs, and there’s more vampires and dangerous things around… but he’s a mage who can set things on fire with a look, and he’s riding a carnivorous nightmare, and he’s survived the London East End before any of that. So damn it, he wants to feel wild and free and adventurous for a day.
He saddles up with his very comfy saddle, ties on the saddle bags stuffed with tea and sandwiches and treats the house, of course, provides, and sets off for the fun kind of adventure.
Which it really turns out to be. It’s cool and grey, misty and drizzly at times, but in his good wool clothes he’s warm, and it means there’s hardly anyone around. The moors are melancholic and desolate, wreathed in fog and glittering beads of water. Hannibal enjoys running full out, steam rising from his mane and hooves. Arthur has lunch on top of a rock overlooking the landscape, and the ocean a grey expanse in the distance, Whitby and the coastline only dark, indistinct smudges.
For the first time that Arthur can ever remember, he feels like… like he can do things. Go places. He doesn’t want to- he’s only starting to have a family and friends, and Darcy’s still missing and he wants her back, but if he wanted to… if he wanted to, he could take Hannibal right now and go anywhere. Do anything, become anyone. He’s returning home not because he has to, not because there’s no other choice- but because he wants to. Because it is home. Not the castle- the castle is as much a curse as a blessing. But Art and Quincy, and yes, John and Mariam, too.Maybe nobody else bonds through surviving things together, maybe that’s just him- but does that matter? He can be their friend, consider them that, before they consider him a friend. If it takes them longer, fine. He can still like them.
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